


when you cant sleep at night

by hanzo_png



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Hanzo misses McCree, Long-Distance Relationship, M/M, McCree misses Hanzo, they're just a phone call away from each other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-05
Updated: 2017-10-05
Packaged: 2019-01-09 08:10:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,032
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12272382
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hanzo_png/pseuds/hanzo_png
Summary: Hanzo has a rough night, but Jesse isn't there with him to bring him back down to Earth.





	when you cant sleep at night

**Author's Note:**

> just a quick lil thing I wrote when I couldn't sleep last night

  Hanzo sits out on the balcony around midnight, unable to sleep, his head swimming with thoughts of self doubt, pain, heartbreak, all the mistakes he's ever made… He lights a cigarette, leaning against the railing, the chilly night air cooling him down a little. The moon was dim, which he didn't like very much. His heart aches a bit as he watches smoke float up into the air and get blown away. He was starting to over think now, and the panic was starting to set in. He didn't know why this happened, but it did, and it was even worse now that Jesse wasn't here. 

  He wants to refuse to tear up, he doesn't want to cry, he doesn't want to let this get the best of him. But it happens anyways, and he's left sniffling on that damn balcony. Jesse should be here, and Hanzo is angry he's not. He knows it couldn't be avoided; Jesse had work to do that made it so he had to travel. Sometimes really far away. If Hanzo remembers right, Jesse is in Europe with Sombra doing some undercover work. He wishes he were back here. Back  _ home _ . 

  He bows his head, his eyes closed, trying to stop the tears. It's not working very well. If Hanzo was honest, the only thing keeping him here, keeping him grounded and essentially alive was Jesse. As ridiculous as it sounded, Hanzo had too many demons. Too much sin on his back and too much guilt in his heart. He knew Genji was fine. He knew his brother had forgiven him long ago and that he no longer wanted Hanzo to hurt. But Hanzo couldn't just shake it all off so easily. In fact…he'd wished for death for a while now. Jesse knew, of course he knew, and he'd done his absolute best to just be there for him. Jesse didn't want to push or make him uncomfortable by being overbearingly supportive. Instead he was there when Hanzo needed it, and helped him through the especially hard nights. But now Jesse wasn't here on a particularly bad night, and Hanzo just…wanted it all to be over.

  Before Hanzo can finish his cigarette, his phone rings from where it sits on the nightstand inside. He sniffs, stamps out his cigarette, wipes his eyes and goes inside to pick it up. His heart jumps a bit when he sees Jesse's name on the screen. He takes a deep breath, forcing himself to calm down before he picks up the phone. 

  “Hey there, darlin’,” Jesse murmurs upon Hanzo picking up. His voice was rough and rumbly, and it was obvious he'd just woken up. Hanzo can't fathom how  _ good _ it is to hear Jesse's voice again.

  “Jesse,” He whispers, smiling slightly into the phone. “How are you?” He asks, but Jesse just sighs. 

  “I'm fine. Woke up a few minutes ago, had a weird feelin’ that I should call you. I miss you a lot, Han, I just want ya to know that.”

  Hanzo sniffs again, his heart twisting, and Jesse is immediately alert.

  “Are you cryin’?” He asks, sounding just a little panicked now. “Hanzo, darlin’-”

  “I miss you too. So much.” Jesse had to admit, it was odd hearing Hanzo be so honest with his feelings when he usually just brushed them off or ignored it and pretended like it was nothing. “I wish you were here.”

  “Hey, I know, honey. I wish I was there too. Can ya tell me what's wrong? I don't want ya to cry…” Jesse sounds really concerned. 

  “I just…I'm having a rough night,” He admits quietly, sounding embarrassed. Jesse sighs quietly on the other end. 

  “Oh, Han…I'm sorry,” He murmurs. “Do ya think you'll be alright? Should I ask Angela to check up on ya?” He asks, still concerned. Hanzo shakes his head a bit. 

  “No, I'm okay, I think. It'd just be easier if you were here with me,” Hanzo explains as he looks around the quiet, dark room, one that seemed less dark and sad with Jesse in it. 

  “I know.” Hanzo can hear Jesse get up, and the rustle of fabric. He must be getting out of bed. “Hey, darlin’, do me a favor? In our closet, I left my serape. I know it sounds dumb, but…I figured you'd want at least somethin’ of mine to cuddle with or somethin’.”

  Hanzo looks at the closet door, then gets up to open it. And there it was, that familiar piece of red fabric. Hanzo picks it up, smiling softly. Jesse had left this knowing Hanzo might've needed it. His heart swells a little, and for a moment he forgets why he was upset. “Jesse…thank you,” He whispers, and Jesse just chuckles. 

  “No problem, darlin’. You think you'll be okay now?” He asks, and Hanzo nods slightly as he speaks. 

  “Yes, I'll be okay,” He murmurs, sitting back down on the bed-  _ their  _ bed -and wrapping the serape around himself. He lies down and curls up a bit, breathing in Jesse's scent. It made him feel less lonely. It almost felt like Jesse was lying there with him, and Hanzo was wrapped up in his embrace. 

  “Good. I gotta get goin’, Sombra wants to head out early.” He starts grabbing his clothes from around his hotel too. “I love you, Hanzo,” He says quietly, very firm but soft at the same time, like he was trying to get it through Hanzo's head, which could be a bit tough when he got in his moods. 

  Hanzo is quiet for a moment before he nods a little bit. “I love you too, Jesse,” He whispers, closing his eyes. Already he felt drained, tired, and ready to just sleep. Jesse always knew how to bring him back down to Earth again, and keep him calm. 

  Jesse smiles into the phone. “I'll see you when I get home, darlin’. Sleep well.” And he hangs up the phone. Hanzo sets his phone back on his nightstand and wraps the serape around him a bit tighter, feeling comforted and…and loved.

  It only takes moments for him to finally fall asleep. 


End file.
